Friends with Benefits Special Edition Paperback

“You paying attention, angel? The Falcons are playing. I know how much you can’t wait to see me on the field in that uniform.” 

I smiled at his off-hand comment. Well, he was still an arrogant jerk, but maybe people weren’t always so black and white. He could be arrogant, but he could also be spectacularly kind and gentle, especially with the twins. 

And—I’ll admit—with me. 

At first, I thought it was a ploy to get in my pants. It wouldn’t have been the first time a guy tried to be nice and considerate only to pull a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde deal once the sun came up. But even when I had turned him down, even when one year had passed, then two, then three, he was still the same old Tripp. Maybe a little more settled than the skirt-chaser he’d been as a freshman. But he was still Tripp. 

Still the boy who’d always made me feel…more right in my own skin. 

I couldn’t help but compare him to Chris, my one and only long-term relationship. 

With Chris, it had been nice, not fireworks like I’d imagined, but I’d liked giving him pleasure. I liked the connection forged during intimacy. But it’d never been…I don’t know…entirely comfortable. Now that I thought about it, sex had always been about making sure his needs were met instead of exploring ours together. He’d certainly never made my pleasure a focus. 

Not how I was imagining it’d be like with Tripp. 

I let my mind wander, letting myself consider being with him in a way I never had before. How gentle he’d be, but at the same time, how thorough and demanding. There’s no way he’d ever let me stop without coming first, like he’d said. I could almost see the intensity his expression would hold as he watched me tip over the edge. 

It was wrong. 

But it felt so right. 

I shifted on the couch beside him, glancing to make sure he didn’t see how clearly turned on I was becoming. Even in the thin camisole and yoga pants, I was overheating. Thankfully, he was engrossed in the game on the TV and wasn’t paying me any mind. 

At some point, his arm had drifted down to my shoulder, and he’d begun twirling my hair in his fingers. This time, I couldn’t stop the shiver. Automatically, he shifted closer as though to share his warmth to alleviate the chill. 

The fireflies in my stomach doubled. No, quadrupled.

Did it make me a terrible person because I wanted to lose myself in him? I wanted those strong arms around me, wanted to wrap myself in the comfort he offered, to blot out everything going wrong in my life. Aside from the twins and my friends, he was the one bright spot. How had I not seen it? Maybe I’d been too afraid to look too closely. 

“You’re staring at me,” he said, and I blinked. At some point, he’d stopped watching the game. Probably around the time I had started fantasizing about him. 

My cheeks heated. “I’m sorry. I’m totally zoning out.” 

“That’s alright, angel. You’ve got a lot on your plate.” His trademark Cheshire grin softened, and I made a split decision. 

I kissed him.

I blamed the fireflies. 

The moment our lips touched, I knew it was a mistake, but that didn’t mean I pulled away. No, pulling away was an impossibility. I was helpless to correct it. 

I’d be lying if I said I’d never fantasized about kissing Tripp before. Especially in the beginning, when it was harder to resist him after we first met. But this kiss? This kiss…was worse than anything I could have ever imagined. 

Because I never wanted to stop.

Friends to Lovers, Friends with Benefits, Sports Romance, New Adult Romance, Small Town

Miscarriage, Pregnancy in epilogue, graphic sex, parental neglect